All right guys, Blog Meeting

“Deuce?”

Deuce: “Present.”

Jables?

Jables?

Gonna mark him down as “Not Present.” Slacker.

Le Ginge?

Le Ginge?

Deuce: Tort... Cock... Red Hair.

What’s that, Deuce? He’s got a… “Mid-term?” Unacceptable. Well, we’re not in any legal trouble yet so looks like he’s not necessary at the moment.

b. Lee... “Present.”

Okay, Item 1: Blogs.

Says here, “Need more blogs.”

Off to a good start here gentlemen. But we can do better. We can start by having Jables getting his shitty ass of the pot and writing up the funny for the good people of the Internet, but we’ll see what happens. He has been busy trying to collect welfare checks for the past few months. Life's tough on the streets.

Item 2: A Touch of Madness

We got something special planned for the people this March and I just know everyone is excited about it. I know I am VERY excited about it. Shoot, you might as well call me the "bone wolf" for the next few weeks (and beyond if you’d like). Because we just launched the blog post-NFL season, the idea will seem foreign to our substantial readership, but we will be providing you with a sneak peak of our flagship gimmick during the March festivities provided by the NCAA. Stay tuned.

And to my faithful staff and co-workers, get your puns and borderline offensive, well, let’s just be honest and call them offensive, allusions together. We're going to need all of them. We’re calling it The Sickness (or the Illness… we’ll put it to a vote).

Item 3: Commenters

Can I get some fucking comments on this thing? God damn! Might help if google actually picked up our blog when searched for, but who am I kidding? If any of y’all like what you see, spread the word, because this party is just getting started, and I would hate to see anyone (especially your more attractive friends), miss out of on this shindig.

Item 4: What the fuck, Deuce?

I know that your fear of black people kept you in the comfy confines of your Phoenician mobile home this weekend, but I did need some All-Star shit! Give it!

Tell the people about the game of sexual H.O.R.S.E. you played with OJ Mayo and that homeless guy from down on Lower Buckeye. The people want to know who won! I trust your "Reverse Yankee Fist-Pump" was not reproducible, but that's only one letter. Did GEICO sponsor this one as well? Or was it Bang Bros? If so, was it as long and painful as the game of H.OR.S.E that OJ played in earlier that day against Kevin Durant and the JZA (Yes, Joe Johnson, and yes, you heard it here first)? Or, was it as long and painful as that other... "thing"? The people want to know!

Okay guys, good to see you all. Let's reconvene in a few weeks. I'm feeling Austin should be the site of our next meeting. Not that my closet of an office isn't nice and all, but there's not enough leggy blondes walking around for my taste.

Meeting adjourned.