Points of Order

ONE. Charles Rogers tried to sign with the Winnipeg Blue Bombers yesterday to play football. Then today, the Bombers took a second look at their rulebook, and realized they weren't allowed to do that. Why do I care? Because it gives me an excuse to post the following video, courtesy of www.tiricosuave.com/ and then watch it over and over for the rest of the afternoon.

TWO. MEANINGFUL FOOTBALL STARTS TONIGHT!!!

As in, less than 5 hours. Yeah, they're only amateurs. But so what! It finally fucking matters!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

/repeated fist pumps

So take yourselves from 6 to midnight (or in the case of our dear editorer, from 7 to around 11:15) and prepare to have your retinas singed by TMNT-green and piss-yellow of the #16 Oregon Ducks as they combat the bleu-n-orange paintspill of the #14 Boise St. Broncos, splayed across a canvas of infamous faded blue turf.

Whether you blow AY-DAY or not, you may want to consider it for tonight's visually stunning debut of Football 2009. Our time has come. Prepare to be lifted.