Insignificant Monster Dunk Better than Brilliant Game Clinching Goal

Apparently.

Oh, hello there!  You must be looking for something to read, right?  What?  My absence and lack of other-consciousness was not sufficient for you.  I do apologize, but things got a little real over the weekend and I just had to keep my head down and hands up until it passed. It hasn't yet passed, but I'm a professional, not some mid-level band stuck at an airport in Glasgow waiting for the ash to pass.

Go on...

A Brand New Day

What's this?

Has ESPN finally expanded suffrage to the unwashed masses?  Allowing them to be counted amongst the Elect?  Sharing public bathrooms and water fountains?

Must be a glitch in the system somewhere.

Go on...

Regularly Scheduled Programming

Presenting a list of games that ESPN feels are more important than the Kansas (#2) - Kansas State (#5) matchup that will surely produce at least one number 1-seed in the NCAA tournament (presented in order of ridiculousness):

Go on...

Hi, Times

Emergency posting.


At least I think it's an emergency. 


I'm pretty sure it is, but I also know that the situation will shortly resolve itself once a reverse backlash is brought upon the initiators of the backlash in effort to restore order.


Hysteria is upon us:


Headline: Kobe-Lebron ads feature gun slang


So, I think I get it-


Guns are dangerous, or something.


Right?


But you know what else is dangerous?  Poor journalism.


I'd say get fucked, but you don't even deserve it.

Berthiaume-Fail

On Baseball Tonight, this past Saturday evening, Steve Berthiaume, in response to the news that Daisuke Matsuzaka would be returning to the Red Sox rotation, declared that "Daisuke STINKS!"

"He stinks," he even repeated.

"The minor league numbers just aren't there," he elaborated.

"Probably allowed 5 ER and 17 walks," he overstated.

And then Daisuke took the mound on that fateful Tuesday evening and shutdown the Red Sox' eventual playoff opponent in the 2009 AL Divisional Series. Official line from last night's game:

6 IP
0 ER
3 Hits
3 BB
5 K

Pretty stinky, eh Stevie?

And of course, it's only one start. He could always revert to, oh say, last year's numbers:

5 2/3 IP
2 ER
4.5 Hits
3 BB
5 k

To be fair, this would actually be a step back for Daisuke-san, so maybe you are onto something, Steve-o. Or maybe you should just keep a lid on it. Not to step on ESPN-Fail's toesies or anything, but this little outburst seemed not only unwarranted, but downright erratic and maybe a little personal, as well (What's the matter, Bert? Guy owe you money, or something?). Of course this, what shall we call it, poor choice of words was sputtered at the end of the show, during valuable, awkward "ad lib" time, and it was late on a Saturday night in the presence of the "All-Star" crew. That being said, do better next time, Stevesie. Otherwise, I know a few Yakuza who don't believe that a blog post is a sufficient enough rebuke for such flagrant disrespect.

Ja-ne for now.