The Day After Dan Snyder

I know... A music review in the middle of a sports fan's ground zero?  Sometimes I seek refuge in the simpler things in life, when the art of running, jumping, and tackling just becomes a little complex for my waning mental processes.  Well, it's not really the physical attributes mentioned above that get me all curious George, but the financial considerations that make the operators of such movements go.  Because, seriously... What the fuck?

Go on...

Hi, Times

Emergency posting.


At least I think it's an emergency. 


I'm pretty sure it is, but I also know that the situation will shortly resolve itself once a reverse backlash is brought upon the initiators of the backlash in effort to restore order.


Hysteria is upon us:


Headline: Kobe-Lebron ads feature gun slang


So, I think I get it-


Guns are dangerous, or something.


Right?


But you know what else is dangerous?  Poor journalism.


I'd say get fucked, but you don't even deserve it.

Tiger is the New Ron Artest

Via RA Therapy

Dear Tiger,

Go on...

It's Curse-Free Week at FSD!

That's right, folks.  For the rest of the week, we are banning the use of profane language in our posts.

Why are we doing this? Consider it an exercise in expression, as well as a challenge to break our reliance on the naughty aspects of our language, in order to encourage creativity and inspire, ahm... Inspiration! So feel free to  give a short, sweet farewell to cocksuckers, fuckfaces, and shitbirds, for their time is, temporarily, at an end.  Bid a fond adieu to the cuntmuffins, open assholes, and dicksmokers of the world.  And of course, a hearty adios to the spicmicnighonkhoopleguineas that we hold so near and dear.

And so it goes, these are the last "ear muff"-requiring words you will read on this page for the next four days.  Should you suffer withdrawal symptoms, I ask you, kind army of commenters, to post your Tourette's-induced splurges at some other location.  However, if you would like to join us in this experiment, then by all means, please do so.

And so we're off,  flabby pussy flaps of the blogosphere.  Let's do this thing and  remember to keep it clean until the weekend.  Be bold and keep the cursing to inaudible tones and illiterate scribbles.  And I wish you good luck in this crusade.

Fuck.  This is gonna suck.

NFL Network Strikes Again

All we wanna do, is sit on my couch, eat some beef ribs, and watch some pre-season football. But is that possible? Not if the suits over at Comcast and the NFL Network have their way.

No, sir. For you see, BIG Cable and the NFL have teamed up once again to stick it to the lil man. Because, in all honesty, all I wanna to do is watch the future non-member of my FIGHTIN' Texans' secondary go up against the future 4th wide receiver of the San Fagcisco Sixty-Niners. That's it. That some kinda crime 'er sumthin?

That's right, folks. The NFL Network has claimed exclusive ryghts to every pre-season game from now all the way up until opening night. I'm callin it a liberal, Obama conspiracy. Pansies hate football is all that is. And they hate free football more'n anything.

First the feds make us git rid of our ol' rabbit ears, and we say, "fine." Now, they's tryin to make us git some big ass cable package. Nuh uh. Nosiree. In this 'conomy, they thinkin' we can afford this buuullshit? Man, I don't even like that Rick Eisen and Deion's clothes makes my eyes hurt.

So, NFL, if you's thinkin you can pork us, and refuse me my disalienable ryght to pre-season football, then you's damn fool. I'm gonna go git me some UFL, and you'lls a come runnin'.

And another thing, we don't need no Latina judges!