Countdown to 2010... Prohibition Edition

As your may or may not know, the extraodinarily dangerous (oh, and beautiful) country of South Africa will be hosting the World Cup in the summer of 2010. This asshole plans on attending so long as this site starts bringing the appropriate level of advertising revenue. So far we're off to a bad start, but a man can dream, right? Tickets are already on sale as we speak (well, the lottery for tickets is underway), but if you plan on getting a head start on your packing, just make sure you leave the following items at home...

Prohibited Items

Unless otherwise authorized by the FIFA World Cup Authorities in writing, Stadium Visitors and Accredited Persons are not permitted to use, possess, hold or bring into the Stadium the following Prohibited Items:

• a) weapons of any kind;
• b) anything that could be used as a weapon or to cut, thrust or stab, or as a projectile, in particular long umbrellas and other unwieldy implements;
• c) bottles, cups, jugs or cans of any kind as well as other objects made from PET, glass or any other fragile, non-shatterproof or especially tough material or Tetrapak packaging, hard cooler boxes;
• d) fireworks, flares, smoke powder, smoke canisters, smoke bombs or other pyrotechnics;
• e) alcoholic beverages of any kind, narcotics or stimulants;
• f) racist, xenophobic cause, charity or ideological concern related materials, including but not limited to banners, signs, symbols and leaflets, objects or clothing, which could impair the enjoyment of the Event by other spectators, or detract from the sporting focus of the Event;
• g) flagpoles or banner poles of any kind. Only flexible plastic poles and so-called double-poles that do not exceed 1 metre in length and 1 cm in diameter and which are not made of inflammable material are permitted;
• h) banners or flags larger than 2m x 1m50. Smaller flags and banners are permitted provided that they are made from material which is deemed "of low flammability" and complies with national regulations and standards;
• i) any sort of animals;
• j) any promotional or commercial, materials, including but not limited to banners, signs, symbols and leaflets, or any kind of promotional or commercial objects, material and clothing;
• k) gas spray cans, corrosive, flammable substances, dyes or receptacles containing substances which are harmful to health or are highly flammable. Standard pocket cigarette lighters are permitted;
• l) unwieldy objects such as ladders, stools, (folding) chairs, boxes, paperboard containers, large bags, rucksacks, suitcases and sports bags. "Unwieldy" is given to mean all objects which are larger than 25cmx25cmx25cm and which cannot be stowed under the seat in the Stadium;
• m) large quantities of paper and/or rolls of paper;
• n) mechanically-operated instruments which produce an excessive volume of noise such as megaphones, hooters or gas-powered horns. Unbranded vuvuzelas are not considered Prohibited Items;
• o) laser pointers;
• p) cameras (except for private use and then only with one set of replacement or rechargeable batteries), video cameras or other sound or video recording equipment;
• q) computers or other devices used for the purposes of transmitting or disseminating sound, pictures, descriptions or results of the events via the internet or other forms of media; and
• r) other objects which could compromise public safety and/or harm the reputation of the Event as assessed at the sole discretion of the FIFA World Cup Authorities.

Looks like they are being particularly careful this go-round due to the fact that, oh I don't know, the event is being held in a society that could be most accurately described as "sort of stable." Let's hope they change their mind about the "hooters" since, as my boy EB noted, "I don't really see the point of going unless we can see some hooters." I'm excited. I've always wondered what it would be like to attend a sporting event during a race riot. Come June 2010, I think I am going to find out.

And what the shit is a vuvuzela?