Better Know a Contender. PERIOD

The shark is the most efficient and feared predator in the sea.  It doesn't back down, it never passes up a meal, and it will bite you in the ass if the given the opportunity. Sharks have rows of razor sharp that are not only good killing prey, but also good for processing and digesting that prey... In other words, sharks don't choke.

At least in the regular season they don't.

Ah yes, but it is now the playoffs, when selachimorpha asphyxiation increases at an alarming rate.  While statistics have only been kept since 2001, so we cannot be sure if this phenomenon is a result of modern considerations such as global climate change, we can still predict with near certainty a rapid increase of mortality in the Spring:

2001: 5th in Western Conference = 4-2 loss in Quarterfinals
2002: 3rd in Western Conference = 4-3 loss in Semifinals
2003: 14th in Western Conference = Shitty season
2004: 2nd in Western Conference = 4-2 loss in Conference Finals
2005: Insufficient Data.
2006: 5th in Western Conference = 4-2 loss in Semifinals
2007: 5th in Western Conference = 4-2 loss in Semifinals
2008: 2nd in Western Conference = 4-2 loss in Semifinals
2009: 1st in Western Conference = 4-2 loss in Quarterfinals
2010: 1st in Western Conference = ???

So, weather it's the stars getting in their eyes, killer ducks, oils slicks, or wingbones, their is a stimulus occurring that causes this species to lose their apex predatory status once the weather warms each and every year.  One particular curiosity is the disappearance of what is known as the "Jumbo Shark".  Throughout most of the year the Jumbo Shark is ever-present, guiding his school toward impressive gains, setting up a kill better than any other shark in the ocean.  Yet historically, this great leader loses its edge in the April and May months and his school, in turn, loses its way, as well.  Whether this is mere correlation, or abject causation has yet to be scientifically determined.

But, what cannot be discounted, is the morose trend, that each and every season, no matter how dominant the sharks species may appear to be in the winter, that they become ultra-vulnerable in the spring months and are essentially dead in the water.

It's fascinating!

Players to watch:

Evgeni Nabokov - The Sharks workhorse has started over 60 games each season over the last three, posting a save percentage of well over .900.  However, in the playoffs, either all that work begins to take its toll, or Nabokov simply mishandles the pressure.  But we all know it's not all his fault...

Patrick Marleau - Marleau has been the leading scorer on the Sharks for the last two seasons... In the regular season.  In the playoffs over the last two season, Marleau has only been able to provide 6 goals across 17 games.  But we all know it's not all his fault...

Jumbo Shark - "Joe" has been one of the best playmakers in the league for years now.  He's also been one of the biggest douchebags in the league for even longer.  So, suffice it to say that his postseason misfortunes have been well-deserved.  But, to be fair, Joe has been getting a bad rap over the last few postseasons, for Joe has played in 26 games over the last three postseasons, and in those 26 games, he has 26 points. Not bad, especially considering what Marleau and company have been able to accomplish.  The problem is that Joe is fighting against something greater than statistics, sluggish teammates, and a sour public opinion; it's called Karma, and from I hear, it's a huge bitch... Good luck this year, Joe, for we all know that it's all your fault.