The Rhythm is Gonna Get You

As if it were possible for the Miami Dolphins to get any softer/more difficult to take seriously. It just happened...

Gloria Estefan recently purchased a stake in the Miami Dolphins ensuring positive support from middle-aged white men looking for some additional spice in their lives, but negative gains from those who prefer balls with their sports. According to sources, the Dolphins are looking to make gains in the vast Hispanic demographic in Miami-Dade area and believe that the Miami Sound Machine could facilitate some headway... If this were 1985.

And if Dolphins management is looking to make some real, positive gains into the Hispanic community, maybe it's the vaginal mascot that is the real issue. It lacks the necessary machismo that your target audience appreciates.


So, we here at FSD have come up with with a few suggestions for new team names:

The Defectors

The Mojitors

The Vices

The Pride (No, not like the Lion... Like the Gay)

The Rubber Rafters

The Parrotheads

Heat Nuggets (Cross-promotional opportunity! Synergy!)

The Jaywalkers

The Castrators (Better than Castro's Ballbag)

The Sound Machine

Ponder this??? Whose musical crimes are more egregious; Gloria Estefan's or Jimmy Buffett's?

Follow-up question; is it better to burn out or to continue making shitty music for all of my aunts and uncles to enjoy at sold out stadiums each and every fucking summer?

GO AWAY!