Where's Waldolo?

For the second consecutive season, Bartolo Colon has gone AWOL. In 2008, while under the employment of the Boston Red Sox, Colon was suspended after desaparición somewhere down in the Dominican Republic. Rumor has it that Big Bartolo was to be moved to the bullpen in order to make room for Paul Byrd, and probably would not have even made the post-season roster anyway. But still, what the fuck?

And now he has apparently done the same thing to yet another Sox organization. 'Rolo is scheduled to make a minor league start this evening down in Charlotte, but at the moment, the tubby bastard is MIA. Not sure if he got homesick once again, but has anyone checked the restroom over at the local Bojangles? Fat ass could have just had a mean case of the sChartlotte's, and may have simply fallen asleep on the can after all that hard work. Trust me, it's possible and I think it's a good lead.

One thing is for certain, if Chubby plans on being employed next season, he best find some Prep. H wipes and get on over to the park tonight. Takes a good salary to support El Gordo's dietary habits and $2 a day just ain't gonna cut it.