En Route: Bracin'

Because this isn't going to end well.

Or perhaps a preemptive strike is in order?  Why wait for the inevitable heartbreak, and broken hopes for a stable future?  Find someone or something else with which to occupy my time.

But what if it never ends?  What if this last meeting together lasts forever.  An endless string of Overtime sessions, cheating finality and conclusion forever and ever until...

Oh there I go again, being a romantic.  Why can I not remember the good times that we had together, and accept them for what they were, while acknowledging the bad but relegating them to their final resting place in the forgettable past?  Well, probably because I'm a big pussy.

I need someone. 

Oh!  I see something on the horizon.  Not a sure thing... But we'll get there.  In the meantime:

• I bet Freddy would understand. He's been there (Chicago Sports Mob).
• It was all just a silly mistake! We all make them (Zoner Sports)...
• A contract!  Why didn't think of that?  Make it lifelong (Jorge Says No!).
• I guess it happens to all of us.  Even the cutest amongst us (You Got Dunked On).

If this is it, well, let's just say I won't be leaving quietly... Nor will she. 

/wink wink

The Haters Lovers Guide to the Super Bowl

"The world needs haters. Without them, we'd be faced with a society of people walking around, feeling good about themselves."

- Deuce

When no one has the courage, not even the opponents in the upcoming Super Bowl, nor the pundits and professional cocksueses who are too busy messaging the vast egos of professionals and pushing us all to other pursuits in the meantime, one can always rely on FSD to provide the fuel.  The fuel that pushes down on the gas pedal during the morning commute.  The fuel that causes you to attend a Tea Party.  The fuel that makes swallowing a hard loss all the more painless.  The fuel is THE HATE.  And because the teams sponsored here at FSD have (ALL) been bounced from the playoffs, and in lieu of the fact that we must pick a team to support, we are choosing to say "fuck it." If we are gonna be forced (in the end) to lend our support to one of these jagmuffs, then we will not do so without a fight. And so without any additional delay, let us introduce the detestable candidates!

Go on...

Lisping Toward the Super Bowl

With Cole Hamels

Jeziz Chrisz, you guyzzz, can you believe that itzs Super Bowl time already?  I mean, I juszt feels like yeszterday when little white ballzs were flying toward my fazce... The horror!

j/k...

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En Route: Willin'

The NFL always wanted to treat the Pro Bowl as if it were some kind of treat, a dessert, if you will. After the main course that was the season, we had hopefully saved room for some special creation that would send us off into the night, not only nourished, but satisfied. Unfortunately, the Pro Bowl was never all that sweet, and most of us just left the restaurant before it could even be served, content to wander the streets until it was time for the August appetizer.

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Blogsturbation Monday

Yeah, that's not how that word is spelled.  Clean it up before Miami, Colts fans.

Two Weeks Notice. I'm just wondering why the playoffs were even necessary at this point? After a very emotional NFL playoff we have arrived at the conclusion that we knew as early as Week 10: the Colts and Saints are the two best teams in the league. 

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A Haters Guide to the Conference Championships

"The world needs haters lovers. Without them, we'd be faced with a society of people walking around, consistently feeling good bad about themselves."

- Deuce

Because the team(s) sponsored here at FSD have both been bounced from the playoffs and/or never made it, and in lieu of the fact that we must pick a team to support (and with all due respect to KSK), we are choosing to say, "fuck it Yay!" If we are gonna be forced (in the end) to lend our support to some unworthy collection of impressive athletes, then we will not do so without a fight! And so without any additional delay, let us introduce the detestable lovable candidates!

The White Steeds

Why are they unworthy of your support: Because Peyton Manning's reign of advertising terror will NEVER end if his success continues unabated.

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Where Have All the Vinatieris Gone?

Disclaimer: The subject material that follows is simply being presented due to compulsory conditions. In no way does FSD find the subject material of any interest or import. If we had it our way, the subject of the following piece would be banned from competition and consideration, fantasy or otherwise, never to be spoken of ever again. We too have a dream, Martin Luther King, Jr. We too have a dream...

I suck, but at least I gave it my all, right, gang?

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Braking News

According to ESPN, Al Davis has been actively searching for a new head coach for the Oakland Raiders.  The only issue is that Tom Cable is already the head coach and has not yet been fired.  

The situations feels a lot like this:

Go on...

Dear Football

It is with great concern and anguish that I posit the following question:

Is everything okay?

Go on...

A Lovers Guide to the AFC Divisional

"The world needs haters lovers. Without them, we'd be faced with a society of people walking around, consistently feeling good bad about themselves."

- Deuce

Because the team(s) sponsored here at FSD have both been bounced from the playoffs and/or never made it, and in lieu of the fact that we must pick a team to support, we are choosing to say, "fuck it Yay!" If we are gonna be forced (in the end) to lend our support to some unworthy collection of impressive athletes, then we will not do so without a fight! Sure, the playoffs on the whole have been disappointing, considering that 75% of the games have been blowouts.  And maybe the games stunk the most in the AFC.  But, not this time.  No!  This time the AFC is going to show us a thing or two.  And so without any additional delay, let us introduce the detestable lovable candidates!

Devil Rays

Why they are worthy of your support: Because they could very well ugly their way into the Super Bowl with a an effective running game and solid defense.  And when have we seen that before?

Go on...

A Lovers Guide to the NFC Divisional

"The world needs haters lovers. Without them, we'd be faced with a society of people walking around, consistently feeling good bad about themselves."

- Deuce

Because the team(s) sponsored here at FSD have both been bounced from the playoffs and/or never made it, and in lieu of the fact that we must pick a team to support, we are choosing to say, "fuck it Yay!" If we are gonna be forced (in the end) to lend our support to some unworthy collection of impressive athletes, then we will not do so without a fight! Sure, the playoffs on the whole have been disappointing, considering that 75% of the games have been blowouts.  But we had one good game!  And where did it occur?  In the NFC.  And so without any additional delay, let us introduce the detestable lovable candidates!

Holy Mole

Why they are worthy of your support: Because it's New Orleans!  They're so loveable!  And fun!  And dude... New Orleans!  Katrina?  Dude...

Go on...

How we did...

 So, considering that we are just passed the New Year, as well as the end of the NFL regular season, and because it is a time for reflection, we are going to review those NFL previews we provided way back at the end of Summer.  The New Year is a time to look ahead, rather than behind?  I fancy myself a wool coat covered in velcro: it's sticky and when it gets wet, it stays wet.  Go ahead... Run with it.  Plus, it's fun to point out how wrong Deuce had been about so many teams.

Anyway, the final rankings are on the left and the number in parentheses represents our original prediction... Let the bloodbath begin.

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A Lovers Guide to the AFC Wild Card

"The world needs haters lovers. Without them, we'd be faced with a society of people walking around, consistently feeling good bad about themselves."

- Deuce

Because the team(s) sponsored here at FSD have both been bounced from the playoffs and/or never made it, and in lieu of the fact that we must pick a team to support, we are choosing to say, "fuck it Yay!" If we are gonna be forced (in the end) to lend our support to some unworthy collection of impressive athletes, then we will not do so without a fight! Sure, it's not the NFC, but we can still (try) and be excited about the AFC, right?  RIGHT?!?  And so without any additional delay, let us introduce the detestable lovable candidates!

El Al Airlines

Why they are worthy of your support: Because Rex Ryan is a man when you are too busy being afraid to be a man.

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BRAKING NEWS?

(Via ESPN) New England Patriots relocating to Kansas City

According to early reports out of Bristol, Charlie Weis may be joining former and fellow coordinator Romeo Crennel, recently hired as a Defensive Coordinator, as an Offensive Coordinator for the Kansas City Chiefs

Prior to the 2009 season, Patriots vice president of player personnel Scott Pioli was allowed to interview with several other NFL organizations before finally signing on as General Manager with the Chiefs.  Together with Weis and Crennel, the Chiefs will have 3/4 of the Patriots brain trust that put together 3 Super Bowl championships in a span of four years.

Go on...

A Lovers Guide to the NFC Wild Card

"The world needs haters lovers. Without them, we'd be faced with a society of people walking around, consistently feeling good bad about themselves."

- Deuce

Because the team(s) sponsored here at FSD have both been bounced from the playoffs and/or never made it, and in lieu of the fact that we must pick a team to support, we are choosing to say, "fuck it Yay!" If we are gonna be forced (in the end) to lend our support to some unworthy collection of impressive athletes, then we will not do so without a fight! And so without any additional delay, let us introduce the detestable lovable candidates!

The Majestics

Why are they worthy of your support: Because everyone loves a comeback.  No, not Michael Vick's comeback.  But Brian Westbrook's, you know, considering he is probably the key to the Eagles whole playoff run.  Here's to a headache-free playoff run, buddy.

Go on...

The Love is Coming

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

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32 Things

As you may or may not have noticed, this blog is strongly biased toward two things in life: football and music. We try to unify the two in print as well as we do in our own minds, but these things do not necessarily translate all that well when traveling between the abstract to the tangible. But this new segment appears to be prepped for success and understanding. It combines our favorite sport with one of our favorite songs and the two get along just fine, even if it is also combined with one of our least favorite things; NFL recap posts. Regardless, it's 32 Things!

Final Edition.

32 Things - moe.

Rams: After allowing 8 sacks on the day, Colt McCoy and Jimmy Clausen are both considering a one year internship in the Arena Football League.

Lions: Free Calvin.

Buccaneers: So it looks like they mave found a quarterback for the first time in franchise history, but how about getting that defense squared away?

Go on...

32 Things

As you may or may not have noticed, this blog is strongly biased toward two things in life: football and music. We try to unify the two in print as well as we do in our own minds, but these things do not necessarily translate all that well when traveling between the abstract to the tangible. But this new segment appears to be prepped for success and understanding. It combines our favorite sport with one of our favorite songs and the two get along just fine, even if it is also combined with one of our least favorite things; NFL recap posts. Regardless, it's 32 Things!

32 Things - moe.

Panthers: So how many Moore games would they have won if Delhomme had drowned in a swamp last summer?

Jets: Rex Ryan must have been extra nice this year. My Sleeper Special controls its own destiny.

Rams: Congratulations! You've clinched a boy named Suh.

Go on...

Monday Night Fights

When we pigs are not debating which sideline reporter had to "work" the hardest to obtain their position (it's Heidi Watney), or which female tennis player would be the best in the sack (it's Serena), we like to consider more serious, cultured matters such as, "Who would win in a fight?"

This week we got:

Belichick's decision to go for it on 4th down against the Colts in Week 10

vs.

Tomlin's decision to go for an onside kick while leading in week 15

Go on...

32 Things

As you may or may not have noticed, this blog is strongly biased toward two things in life: football and music.  We try to unify the two in print as well as we do in our own minds, but these things do not necessarily translate all that well when traveling between the abstract to the tangible.  But this new segment appears to be prepped for success and understanding.  It combines our favorite sport with one of our favorite songs and the two get along just fine, even if it is also combined with one of our least favorite things; NFL recap posts.  Regardless, it's 32 Things!

Week 15 provided some of the most exciting developments of the entire season, certainly in the National Football League.  Therefore, we've invited John Gruden to provide us with some insights for all 32 teams prior to taking the booth tonight for the Monday night showdown.  Take it away, John...

32 Things - moe.

Saints: Reggie Bush easily has one of the most tender vaginas in the land, certainly in the National Football League.

Browns: Now here's a team, left for dead, that has back-to-back victories, and is playing with a lot of swagger, certainly in the National Football League

Niners: Now Mike Singletary is religious man.  He believes that Jesus Christ wants him to beat people on the football field, which makes him one of the most delusional people, certainly in the National Football League

Go on...