How. F*cking. Sad.

Every now and again, on only the most special of Sunday afternoons, a game has the ability to touch one's heart in the most arresting of ways.  The game may hold some certain significance for you; money is on the line, your favorite team is on the field, or playoff-inclusion could be at stake.  Or, maybe you have simply lent your temporary support to an underdog that has every opportunity to knock off a previously undefeated team but instead chooses to give the game away via terrible decisions, awful execution, and an extreme lack of discipline... Yeah, that's the stuff.  So let's talk about such an instance, shall we?


In the first half, the Miami Dolphins surged to a 24-3 lead over the previously undefeated Saints.  The front 7 were pressuring Drew Brees, never allowing a deep route to fully take shape.  The offense was doing their best to keep the Saints offense off of the field and it was working.  The Dolphins led 24-10 at the break.

But then, this crazy thing called the second half rolls around.  All of a sudden, Tony "Howsyuhfathah" Sparano decides that the best idea is to let his rookie quarterback run the show, and all against the team with the most interceptions in the league.  Let's just say that the results were not surprising.

In nine possessions during the second half, the Dolphins offense managed the following:

• 2 interceptions, both returned for touchdowns
• 2 three-and-outs
• 1 field goal. after a three-and-out, in which they just happened to be in Saints territory
• 1 touchdown drive, which took only 1 minute off the clock, and was only 3 plays long
  
• Under 12 minutes of ball possesion.
• 1 pathetic play-calling effort which largely involved running either all passing plays or all running plays within the same drive
• 1 disastrous final drive that ended with an illegal motion penalty leading to the expiration of time.
• The alienation of one potential fan whose sole duty is to now pull so hard against the Dolphins that it is going to cause him pain anytime the Dolphins mange to accidentally fall backward into a victory.
  

And those were only some of the highlights.

Let's not forget Joey Porter's inopportune 4th quarter unsportsmanlike conduct penalty, which put the Saints into Dolphin territory which eventually led to a John Carney field goal putting the Saints up 6 with just over 3 minutes to play.  But let us not get too wrapped up in the potential retardation of one bad apple, for the Miami defense, putting the score aside, actually played a great game against arguably the best offense in the league.

The real assholes are on the offensive side of the ball for the Dolphins, and that includes the coaching staff, because the Dolphins are probably the least disciplined team in the NFL.  Whether it is dropping passes (I counted 4 in the 4th quarter), not knowing the rules (Camarillo's a dumbass), or moving when you shouldn't be when there is under 6 seconds to play in the game (Hartline isn't much smarter), the Dolphins manged to do it ALL.  All except...

All except...

Littering and...

All except covering the spread.  And let's face it, that chaps this fine ass more than anything else.

So get fucked, Miami.  Assume your position at the bottom of the AFC East and do not even think about coming up for air?  What's that?  Dolphins need oxygen to survive?  Well, that's a shame isn't it.  But to be honest, I always thought Flipper was an arrogant prick.

It was a frustrating weekend, so I'm sure Deuce will be joining us for another bitch session later today, assuming he was able to get out of bed this morning.