En Route: Shoppin'

Christmas is retarded.

Well, at least the process of it anyway.  The consumer feats that is on display is truly wonderful, and it wouldn't be a problem if the whole fandango was simply referred to as "The Consumer Feast".  Or maybe even, "The Feast of Consumers."  Either one works.  And either one would work more than this whole feigning of "spirituality."

Christmas.  Pssht.  Jesus never bought shit, especially on his birthday.  So what the fuck is it always such a rush out the door beginning the very day after Thanksgiving?  And how does this show affection for anyone that receives these gifts?  Sure, kids are different, they need to be indoctrinated.  But we're free-wheeling adults!  Why can't we just back away?  And quickly.

Hey, I spent 4 hours in line at the mall and bought you this fucking gift card.  It wasn't on sale or anything!  Love me!

And if we can't agree, then how about I just spend the time at the mall and not buy you anything?  I spent 3 hours at the mall shopping for you, I just didn't buy anything.  MERRY CHRISTMAS!

After you've swept this challenge aside, take a look at some of this shit:

• If I've gotten you out of the mood, then well, this should help (KSK)
• And allow me to help prepare you for that nap you've been waiting for all day (Empty the Bench)
• You don't nearly look ready enough for the world cup (With Leather)

What?  Only three links?  Well, remember that appeal I made about our long lost Deuce (every day, pal)?  Well, the En Route links are actually his job and the mother fucker can't even do that, let alone drop a post once a month.  So tell you what?  Fuck him.  No more appeals will be necessary.  Guy is about as useful as an asshole on an elbow.

I do thank all those that offered support though... Now, go get that weekend.