Football has left me. We went out with a bang, but she's gone and now it's time for me to start pretending that I don't mind... That I'm better off... That something better is around the corner.
Which is bullshit.
But while I certainly cannot outrun the pain, it is always a good idea to keep your mind as occupied as possible during these times. And what better way to occupy your mind with, well, what generally occupies the mind of any man? But I ain't talking about just thinking about. You gotta actualize it! That's right, folks, it's rebound time. And with just a little effort, it's really quite simple.
You see, when you're down, the fems can smell it. Usually it's those that already reak like booze and vibrating jelly dong. So you can already see why some nice sweat-scented flesh would be attractive, especially on such easy prey as a broken spirited man such as myself. And look what we got here:
Hey hey, NBA All-Star weekend! Looking g... Oh shit, who is that? What are you doing at the same bad as... the Olympics? That's just silly. Step aside, dunk Arcompetition, H.O.R.S.E, and you too, celebrity game. No, I'm not looking for something long haul, but two weeks just might be the perfect amount of time. Maybe I'll take her out to see that new movie with all the beautiful people in it that obviously won't be formulaic, ephemeral, or aggravatingly named after an utterly ridiculous holiday! We just had Christmas with our loved ones! We don't need a second run dang near one month later...
Oh god, it's obvious that I'm not ready for a relationship... Maybe I'll just go see The Wolfman instead, and by myself... I miss her so damn much!
What to read about when you're not wondering where on earth Deuce's Olympic Hockey Preview went:
- Are you Armenian? Bosnian? Wanna be in the Olympics? (Melt Your Face Off)
- Meet my bizarro Serena Williams (The Sportress)
- Big 10 and Big 12 to officially change places (Wizard of Odds)
- And lastly, for all you loners... Willful or otherwise (Uncoached)
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